Today, I dropped the kids off at the bus stop as usual. Being a rainy day they stayed in the car until they saw the bus pull in for fellow travellers. I let them out of the car and they walked towards the bus – walked – not run.
From where I sat in the car it was apparent to me that the queue was shortening and unless they hurried up – to at least a shuffle – they would miss the bus. They didn’t shuffle – they did miss the bus!
I thought “this is interesting … wonder what they’ll do now?”
Will they just expect me to chase the bus? Are they thinking it’s unreasonable to expect them to run (how uncool!) but not unreasonable to expect me to alter my morning plans, leave my youngest daughter at home and get them on the bus.
Should I feel responsible?
It begs the question – should I feel responsible as a parent for making sure they are on the bus OR is it time for them to become responsible for themselves?
I decided that this was as good a time as any to let them experience the consequences of their actions. I was not going to chase the bus but instead they would spend the day with me in my office (how boring!). It would be a salient lesson – if they don’t run to catch the bus then maybe no one else was going to do it for them.
However, before my kids even had a moment to ponder the dilemma – to feel the shock or consequence of their decision – I notice the bus pull into the curb again only 20 metres down the road. I imagine that one of the others on the bus noticed my kids and called out to the driver.
I also imagined what may have gone through the driver’s mind “I will get into trouble if I don’t stop and pick them up. The school, the company, my boss will hold me responsible for them not catching this bus.” He couldn’t risk his job. He probably has a wife, a mortgage and maybe even kids of his own that he feels responsible for. So he fixed the problem.
The final straw
And then came the final straw. While still watching from the car I saw my kids yet again gently stroll towards the bus (not hurry, not rush … and certainly not run). Unbelievable! Have they learnt nothing? They probably haven’t. Or did they learn that there was no need to panic anyway; it all worked out fine.
For my kids, today’s message is ‘run for the bus’. I’m tempted to put this in big letters on our fridge or their bedroom walls, because it is about so much more than the bus – it’s about life. The bus is the opportunities that lie before them in life. Some people strive to be part of what’s happening while some passively wait for others to make it happen for them.
The simple truth is – if you want a seat on the bus of life, you need to be willing to run for the bus.
Comment Link
I agree.